September 28, 2004

Entry: It's the Albatross

Pirates Cove has It's the Albatross:

The Albatross is a gorgeous bird when it is flying. Majestic, magnificent, strong, and graceful. But when it attemps to land, or is on land, wow, just pathetic, which is really how it earned the nickname "Goony bird." The Albatross was considered to be a harbinger of good luck to sailors, since they felt that land must be near. Woops, wrong! Goony birds can fly vast distances, and often stay out at sea for years.

Ah! well a-day! what evil looks
Had I from old and young! 140
Instead of the cross, the Albatross
About my neck was hung.
(The Rime of the Ancient Mariner, stanza 140)

Kerry is wearing many Albatross' around his neck. His constant references to Vietnam. His considerable position changes. His inability to discuss his almost 20 years in the Senate. His lack of anything substantive while in the Senate. Being on the wrong side of almost every vote regarding weapon systems, Intelligence, and taxation.

Posted by Simon at 08:34 AM | Comments (0)

September 27, 2004

Entry: Dialogue of the Day: "You're Bald!"

Editors in Pajamas has Dialogue of the Day: "You're Bald!"

Do you remember that Seinfeld episode (The Beard) where George decided to go with the toupee, and Kramer sets him up on a date with a woman who ends up being... bald?

Posted by Simon at 04:31 AM | Comments (1)

Entry: 3 laws unsafe

Techno-Freek says the 3 laws [are] unsafe:

The possibility of developing truly intelligent machines, and their potential to be friend or foe to humanity, gets the Hollywood treatment in a new blockbuster film I, Robot.At the heart of the movie are Isaac Asimov’s “Three Laws of Robotics”, invented as a simple, but immutable moral code for robots. The film’s plot revolves around an apparent breaking of the laws, when a robot is suspected of murdering a famous scientist.

Posted by Simon at 03:20 AM | Comments (0)

Entry: INFALLIBLE 2004 Presidential Election Predictor

Efficacy has the INFALLIBLE 2004 Presidential Election Predictor:

Whichever candidate wins two out of three of Florida, Ohio and Pennsylvania will win the election.

I have been saying this for months now and many who read my posts already know that in addition to being exceedingly humble, handsome, intelligent and witty, I am very rarely wrong.

Zogby's latest battleground states poll has Kerry currently ahead in both Florida and Pennsylvania while Bush leads only in Ohio. Therefore, if the election were held today, Kerry would win. Unfortunately, the election is not being held today.

Poll enthusiasts will no doubt already be aware that Zogby is unmatched in accuracy in presidential polling in the latest two presidential election cycles (in 2000 he was tied with Harris). It is for that reason I have selected Zogby battleground states poll as the major (but not the only) data point for my INFALLIBLE election predictor.

Posted by Simon at 03:18 AM | Comments (1)

Entry: "Let Them Wear Ketchup!"

The Tip of the Whip says "Let Them Wear Ketchup!":

In Sam Dolnick's Associated Press story yesterday, he reported on the Ketchup Kween's tour of a hurricane relief center in Brooklyn, NY.

I would be more impressed if I could believe that she had done this out of a true desire to help those in need of post-hurricane assistance and not a purely political ploy to show that she, too, understands the difficulties faced by the "common people."

Posted by Simon at 03:14 AM | Comments (0)

Entry: What can John Kerry do to increase his popularity?

Things that make ya go..."What tha?!?!" asks What can John Kerry do to increase his popularity?:

This is a question that is often asked of me by my donkey-lovin' friends. I have one suggestion:

Drop the Vietnam War angle. Instead promote the World War One angle. What angle is that? I'm glad you asked. It's very simple...All Big John has to do is, every time he would normally mention Vietnam, instead say World War One.

Big John - I remember vivdly...in fact, it is seared into my brain, that Christmas Day during World War One that I spent in Cambodia. I was on a boat, I think...yeah...I'm pretty sure I was on a boat. And there was this guy there with me...he had this hat, and he said it was LUCKY! I wanted it pretty bad, so I asked this guy if I could have it. He didn't want to give it up at first. But when I started telling him about all of the medals that I had already won during World War One he changed his tune...

Posted by Simon at 03:11 AM | Comments (0)

Entry: If I Can't Dance...Give Me All Your Money

Let's Try Freedom says If I Can't Dance...Give Me All Your Money:


I think that libertarians are 100% right on governance issues. It would be WONDERFUL if we had a libertarian population and a libertarian state, running around enforcing contracts between private individuals, killing terrorists and communists, upholding laws against force and fraud to let the markets work optimally, and otherwise butting out of American life. It would be so great, I would consider it my own version of earthly utopia.

But it isn't going to happen. It's so far from happening that it isn't even funny.

Posted by Simon at 03:04 AM | Comments (0)

September 24, 2004

Entry: Geek Chic

Pink Lemonade Diva says she's a Geek Chic:

I have a confession. I'm a nerd. There, I said it.

I've never seen any research, but I'm pretty sure that you're born that way and you don't choose it. Some people have it and some definitely don't. And some do, but can never admit it and might even live their life denying their inner nerd. So sad. I always knew I had these tendencies, but I've only just begun embracing them and celebrating them for what they are. And now I see these nerd signs everywhere, but I can't figure out if it's my own metamorphasis from catepillar into butterfly, or if it's part of a larger geek chic thing. Is it finally cool to be nerdy?

Posted by Simon at 02:52 AM | Comments (0)

September 20, 2004

Entry: Belaboring the Obvious

Dummer 'n' Dirt is Belaboring the Obvious:

Unfortunately, as we can see in media reports every day, the terrorists are doing exactly what we thought they would do and it is working. The press reports every day on explosions, firefights, and general destruction with no word given to the fact that every car bomb that goes off in Iraq does so for the express purpose of getting on the news.

Posted by Simon at 09:43 AM | Comments (0)

Entry: For Whom These Bells Toll...

Chronicles of a Medical Mad House has For Whom These Bells Toll...:

Wednesday, September 15, 2004
For Whom These Bells Toll...
I am writing from the confines of my ICU. The machine bells create a certain melody I cannot easily describe. It's amazing how heart rates set to music can sound so beautiful and so scary at the same time.
I returned yesterday as per previous post and already had a big scare when in the first hour one of the patients crashed. She quickly recovered but not before my knees nearly gave out. If anyone saw the episode of scrubs where that intern is running towards a code and hide's in the closet then that's kind of what felt like except there was no closet to be found and everyone was looking at me to shout out some instructions. Three months off practice can play with the memory. Luckily the atropine kicked in pretty quickly and saved me from looking like a huge moron.

Posted by Simon at 09:40 AM | Comments (0)

September 17, 2004

Entry: I'm Fighting Inertia

Fighting Intertia has I'm Fighting Inertia:

It wasn't really supposed to be this way. I swear to you that for the first fifteen years of my life I was 100% certain that I was going to become a veterinarian. Or maybe President of the United States. By college, I had refined my goals somewhat, settling for CEO of a multinational company.

But I am none of those things. I'm a housewife fighting inertia. Fighting the urge to sleep a half hour later in the morning. Or an hour. Fighting the urge to watch Dr. Phil every day. Fighting the urge to play with my kids' Gamecube when they aren't even home.

Posted by Simon at 03:06 AM | Comments (0)

Entry: Showcase

Yankee Pride has the self-titledYankee Pride:

And be prepared and forewarned, that I will tell it like I see it from a northern, republican, YANKEE WOMAN perspective. If you can't handle it.... then click onwards my friend. Otherwise, grab a cup of coffee, a chair and sit a spell.... for some good company at Yankee Pride!

Posted by Simon at 03:01 AM | Comments (0)

September 16, 2004

Entry: What I Wish I Could Tell You

Midtone blue has What I Wish I Could Tell You


I wish I knew how to tell you just how much you really matter. Your voice, your hands, your gifts, your talents, your presence. How, when you are really honest, you are able to break through to people's deepest self and they return your honesty with stories of their own. How your insight, your viewpoint, your unique way of seeing things is exactly what we need. How your faithfulness to the things you believe in will change the world, even if it's one single heart at a time.

Posted by Simon at 04:47 AM | Comments (1)

September 15, 2004

Entry:

Agent Provocateur asks Who are the people in my cubicle farm?:

The Insane Systems Administrator

Habitat: In the datacenter behind three rows of servers, cackling maniacally.
Distinguishing Marks: Bluish gray basement-dweeler's pallor, quixotic delusions of grandeur
Quote: "If it wasn't backed up, then it wasn't important."

Posted by Simon at 04:04 AM | Comments (0)

September 13, 2004

Entry: Stupid Signs

Ogre's Politics & Views hasStupid Signs:

And again it's raining -- so the last sign I saw before I got to work today was, "Caution: Rain may cause Puddles." Thanks for the update. I know people are stupid, but are they really that stupid?

Posted by Simon at 04:47 AM | Comments (1)

September 10, 2004

Entry: Newsnik

Newsnik is a daily summary of news stories from around the Right side of the Web. Featured links represent current coverage of national and world events, issues and pop culture.

Posted by Simon at 05:07 AM | Comments (0)

September 08, 2004

Entry: Our ignorance in exchange for their immortal souls

The New (Online) confessions says "Our ignorance in exchange for their immortal souls.":

Three-fourths into the book "The Da Vinci Code", all I can say is that some of my lifelong questions have been answered by information contained in this fictional thriller. Dan Brown has created a wholly engrossing, enlightening, highly intelligent book which in itself is a work of art.

Posted by Simon at 08:51 AM | Comments (0)

Entry: Marketing problems

The Samp talks about Marketing problems:

Yes, it's true, I don't care much for some of the stuff other marketers do. Don't call me names like "purist" cuz I'm not. But. . . I must pontificate for a few minutes. . . this will be no manifesto, just some thoughts I have. If it makes you think and maybe consider your next move, good.

Sure, there's good stuff out there. But sometimes, I think the art of marketing gets so lost in what we do. What I mean is, a lot of the "stuff" out there is a result of what will sell, not what is needed. Is a marketer wrong for wanting to create lots of products and flog as many as they can? Probably not.

Posted by Simon at 03:31 AM | Comments (1)

Entry: A Student Wore a Shirt

Pogo's World has A Student Wore a Shirt:

Early in the year a student wore a shirt with a Bad Religion no cross symbol on it. I thought it was great that a student would be listening to one of the most socially responsible bands out there. If this kid paid attention to what this band was exploring she would learn how to ask questions. And isn’t asking questions one of the fundamental skills needed for a person to educate themselves? As a teacher’s assistant wasn’t I suppose to reinforce this behavior? She was told by the principal to cover it up and not wear it again. It had offended Christian students.

Posted by Simon at 03:29 AM | Comments (0)

September 07, 2004

Entry: Georgia Southernisms and Newt Gingrich

Au fait has Georgia Southernisms and Newt Gingrich:

Oh, how I miss living in Georgia. There's a bluntness yet eloquence that is "yewneek" to that region...

Posted by Simon at 06:34 AM | Comments (1)

September 06, 2004

Entry: I'd rather be blogging than jogging

Redsaid says I'd rather be blogging than jogging:

I’ve always considered the commute up- and downstairs from my bedroom to the refrigerator here at home to be a stiff (and completely sufficient) workout. Then I noticed the effects of Sir Isaac Newton’s discovery in the mirror one day. I passed out from shock and the next thing you know – when I came to it again – there was a treadmill in my life.

Just like that.

We wearily scouted each other out first, that treadmill and I. (No need to rush into these things. Besides, anything with the word mill at the end of it promises to lead to great unpleasantness and evil. For example: Puppy-mill.)

Always one to approach things intellectually (don’t smirk like that!), I read the accompanying literature first, which came in the form of warranties (although, I have to point out, they don’t guarantee that you’ll make it out of the experience alive!) and instructions.

The instructions basically read: Plug it in, position yourself on the treadmill, flip the switch to ON and run for your life. And the rest of the 200-page booklet contained a series of urgently marked warnings – in VERY small print, I might add – to tell you of all the possible ways you could injure and/or kill yourself.

I promptly dubbed it the D*R*E*A*D*M*I*L*L.

Posted by Simon at 03:46 AM | Comments (1)

September 02, 2004

Entry: The system continues to suck

I'm a man of wealth and taste says The system continues to suck:

I'd promised myself that I wasn't going to blog about my time in the big house anymore. But there are some new, annoying developments.

Everyone arrested with me was allowed to get their personal belongings (purses, keys, phones, etc.) when they were released. However, riding our bikes was part of the reason we were arrested so those were kept as evidence.

Posted by Simon at 04:15 AM | Comments (1)

September 01, 2004

Entry: : Sample Massachusetts Drivers Test

Tequila Mas Fina has a Sample Massachusetts Drivers Test:

There are three types of drivers here: Pokey, Zippy and Apathetic. Pokey, oblivious to speed, rolls along at his own pace. If traffic is flowing at a steady 65, he's comfortable doing 60. There's nothing wrong with that, of course, except he's doing it in the FAST LANE! Zippy, on the other hand, is oblivious to distance. If there is 12 feet between your truck and the car in front of you, he'll zip in and leave you with 2, just to get one whole car length closer to his destination. He's also fond of passing on 2-lane streets during snow storms, heedless of the oncoming snow plow. Apathetic mingles amongst the others mumbling about the crappy drivers, yet does nothing about it, accepting it as gospel or karma. "You screwed up in your past life! Now you have to drive in Massachusetts!" What they all lack is any idea of the concept of 'flow.'

Posted by Simon at 05:22 AM | Comments (0)

Entry: Some Days I Can Barely See My Knees

Tongue Tyed says Some Days I Can Barely See My Knees

It spoke to the sense of fear we all have about aging and success, and finding a "career". It gave us a reprieve from the worry of deciding a major, or deciding which job was the "right" job. It expressed, with such grace, the inner child we all are afraid to let go of and let us know that we didn't have to.

Posted by Simon at 04:55 AM | Comments (0)