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Entry: I'd rather be blogging than jogging

Redsaid says I'd rather be blogging than jogging:

I’ve always considered the commute up- and downstairs from my bedroom to the refrigerator here at home to be a stiff (and completely sufficient) workout. Then I noticed the effects of Sir Isaac Newton’s discovery in the mirror one day. I passed out from shock and the next thing you know – when I came to it again – there was a treadmill in my life.

Just like that.

We wearily scouted each other out first, that treadmill and I. (No need to rush into these things. Besides, anything with the word mill at the end of it promises to lead to great unpleasantness and evil. For example: Puppy-mill.)

Always one to approach things intellectually (don’t smirk like that!), I read the accompanying literature first, which came in the form of warranties (although, I have to point out, they don’t guarantee that you’ll make it out of the experience alive!) and instructions.

The instructions basically read: Plug it in, position yourself on the treadmill, flip the switch to ON and run for your life. And the rest of the 200-page booklet contained a series of urgently marked warnings – in VERY small print, I might add – to tell you of all the possible ways you could injure and/or kill yourself.

I promptly dubbed it the D*R*E*A*D*M*I*L*L.